Taking Care of Business

Sex is serious business… and I mean that literally!  The sex business is a 13 billion dollar a year business in the United States.  Everything from sex movies, toys, lingerie, magazines, condoms, swingers clubs and dating websites, the sex business is booming!  And rumor has it, the sex business is one of the only industries that is recession proof!  And if you aren’t taking care of YOUR sex business, someone else will!

There’s a perception that women rule the sex business.  Well, maybe we do but men have more control than they think.  If you want to increase the productivity of your business, then you must increase your efforts.  Gentlemen, if you want to have more sex and better sex, listen up!  I’m about to tell you how.

First of all, Gentlemen…don’t be so damn gay!  Yes, I said it.  Now, before I get a shit ton of hate mail, just keep reading.  I love the gay man.  I really do.  A gay man is my best friend.  We go shopping together, we get matching manicures and pedicures.  We check out other hot guys together.  But I do not have sex with him!!  Nor do I WANT to!  I can totally appreciate you guys getting waxed and plucked and tanned and buff and massaged.  But, I don’t really need to hear the exotic details of how you get your Chewbacca back hair ripped out once a month on a Saturday afternoon.  Yes, I absolutely just love me a sexy, smooth man. And you should absolutely get it waxed.  Speaking of smooth, please don’t trim your nose hair in front of me. Don’t even turn the electric nose hair trimmer on when I’m in the vicinity.  I can hear that buzzing sound all the way from the kitchen.  It’s not sexy or cute.  But please, by all means, do the trimming.  Just not in my presence.  And we also don’t need to discuss all of the amazing and fabulous storage pockets in your newest Gucci man purse.  Now, the Gucci man purse is cool, no doubt.  But it doesn’t make me want to forget my panties and sit on your lap.

Secondly, for the love of God, do man stuff.  Fix some things around the house or in the garage.  Ok, so what if there’s nothing broken?  Install some things.  Track lighting, shelves, surround sound, tile…anything!  Or go do something manish in the garage.  Change the oil in your car, move your tools around, sweep the garage floor, get your hands dirty.  Just manify the garage in general.  Women think that is really freaking hot!!  A man who can add some shelves to my closet for my shoe collection will definitely make me forget my panties!

And last but not least, make us feel beautiful!  Gentlemen, here’s a secret for ya!  Women who FEEL beautiful are ten times more likely to get naked than a woman who IS beautiful but doesn’t feel like it.  Listen now, don’t go messing up this step.  You’re almost there!  Here are some ways you can make your beautiful woman feel like a beautiful woman.  Bring her coffee in bed and tell her that she’s beautiful in the morning.  Guys, I don’t even want to hear you say it.  “But she’s not beautiful in the morning.”  I will personally come check YOUR oil for ya!  Just suck it up and tell your woman she’s really freaking hot in the AM.  Just trust this process.  Also, don’t say any dumb shit like “I liked your hair better the other way.”  Not good.  This is a great example of making her feel the opposite of beautiful.  And it’s ok if you feel like you liked her hair better the other way.  Just don’t say that.  But when she looks a certain way or wears something or smells the way that drives you crazy, that is the perfect opportunity for YOU to get what you want!  You must tell her that what she’s doing or what she’s wearing drives you absolutely, insanely crazy.  And guess what, she’ll feel beautiful and she’ll want to be beautiful for you all the time.  Which means, more and better sex for YOU!

Now, let’s wrap this up so you can wrap yourself up and go get dirty with your beautiful girl.

1.  Don’t be gay.

2.  Do man stuff.

3.  Make us feel beautiful.

Gentlemen, good luck taking care of business!!  Let me know how it goes and you’re welcome!! And until next time, keep it sexy and SAFE!!

Ask your sex questions! Taylor Kennedy can be reached via email at taylorkennedy@brohamnation.com.